Older Women Want Sex More, not Less
Older Women Want Sex More, not Less
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This was published 9 years ago
Why Older Women Is The Only Skill You Really Need
Older women want sex more, not less
Why Women Like Older Men
By Clare Kermond
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How To Meet Grannies
"No matter how you look, from when you're young to now that you're very old, you're exactly the same person. All those preferences and urges, for physical touch, for sex, for companionship, they're all the same."
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At 75 Sarah* seldom sees women her age held up by the wider world as attractive, let sexually desirable alone, but desire, she says, doesn't fade with age.
Why Do Older Women Not Want Sex
Research shows many women in their 60s, 70s and 80s possess a lot more period for gender than before ever.Credit: Getty images
"It's not this high-octane compulsion that it used to be, but it's not necessarily that it's not there. Maybe it's morphed into something a bit more subtle."
Twice divorced and with her current partner for three years, Sarah says that while it's largely accepted that men will continue to have sexual feelings as they age, the same isn't true for older women.
She sees the myth about women losing their sexuality over the years as part of the invisibility that older women so often suffer. "It's very wrong, along with a great deal of the assumptions about more aged females."
8 Ways Older Women Will Improve Your Sex Life
Sarah says that while a lot of older women don't like their bodies, and may struggle to see themselves as attractive, life in the retirement years, including your sex life, can be a best suited period of great liberty.
New insight into a typically taboo subject has found that many women in their 60s, 70s and 80s possess additional, not less, sexual desire, know more about what they want in bed and are more confident about letting their partners find out.
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Free from the exhaustion and constant interruptions of early family life, and past the looming fear of unwanted pregnancies, many women are newly enthusiastic about their sexual desires and have a far broader idea of what a happy and satisfying sex life might involve.
How To Talk To Older Women
As the women who led the sexual revolution of the 1960s and 70s hit older age, it seems many of them are once again tearing up social conventions and redefining what sexual desire means to them.
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Researchers on a joint Victorian and New South Wales study, Sex, Desire and Pleasure: Considering the Experiences of Older Australian Women, say their findings have debunked many of the myths surrounding sex for older women.
How To Meet Older Women For Sex
Dr Bianca Fileborn, of La Trobe University's Australian Research Centre in Sex, Society and Health, says far from women's level of sexual desire gradually fading away over time, many women's appetite for sex and intimacy increases in later years and that this is driven by factors other than ageing.
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"Some women did experience that kind of gradual decline, just as they gone through menopause specifically, [but] for other women they experienced a great increase in sexual desire. For a whole lot of ladies their erotic need seemed to be fairly smooth across their lifetime.
"A lot of women have periods in their lives, for example when they had young children, when they weren't all that interested in sex, most probably because they had been depleted. So it wasn't that linear decline, it's something that ebbs and flows across the life span," she says.
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One of the women interviewed for the research, aged 57, described this stage as the best time in her life, sexually. "The women I've known, like in this stage of my life, are not frightened of sex. I reckon it's probably the best time in your life actually because you're not going to have kids, you don't have to think about a house."
Researchers also found that many older women have a diverse idea of what makes up satisfying sexual activity and were keen for their partners to broaden their repertoire.
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"There is thwill be wide spread assumption that older people and particularly older women are asexual, and one of the really striking things about our research is that it does show that older women do continue to engage in a big variety of sexual practices and that sex will be still a really important source of pleasure and intimacy for them," Dr Fileborn says.
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Faced with health issues and diminished agility, various older women interviewed for the scholarly review talked about a desire to engage in lustful activities additional than penetration.
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Researchers say health practitioners and others should be discussing alternative forms of pleasure for older women. "This could include, for example, thinking of everyday or open up sexual intimacies interactions, the work with of intercourse supports and playthings, the apply of porn material which will be especially intended to fulfill the necessities and needs of aged ladies, or the use of commercial sex workers".
Research fellow Rachel Thorpe, in addition from La Trobe College, says a discussion about sex not being limited to penetration is something that should be encouraged throughout life, somewhat than longing until both men and women have been older and facing health problems.
Older Women Who Want To Have Sex
One woman interviewed for the study complained that after her husband had undergone prostate surgery and could not maintain an erection, he refused to engage in any sexual activity, or to talk about other options.
Older Women? It's Easy If You Do It Smart
But Thorpe said many older women were confident about discussing their sexual desires and talking to their partners about trying new things and broadening their sexual repertoire.
Another key finding from the study is that older women often have contradictory feelings about their own desirability. While many women interviewed feel that their bodies aren't attractive any more, and don't not see images of women like themselves held up as desirable by society, when they are engaged in sexual activity with a partner they come to feel desirable.
Thorpe says that for women in long-term relationships in particular, how their body appears isn't all that important in making them feel sexually desirable.
= $ =p=# =" A full lot, 'oh my body is old, it's saggy and wrinkled, but when I'm with my partner having sex or even just when I'm naked I actually find myself quite attractive and I get a lot of pleasure from my human body.'"
Why Do Young Women Like Older Men
Sarah echoed this feeling of enjoying an older body, even if society didn't seem to find it desirable.
"I do have those reservations about not being taut and terrific. I appear at my arms and 'oh my gosh' Sometimes, but I've haven't had any discouragement or been made to feel by my partner that there's any problem. I've never possessed any criticism, I've been supported."
Researchers also say the study's findings have clear implications for doctors and other health professionals, who do not really consider the sexual demands of older people typically. For example, many doctors prescribe medications that may interfere with sexual function and don't discuss the effects of procedures, such as prostate surgery, on patients' sex lives.
How To Ask Older Women For Sex
Researchers said there is an important role for health care providers to initiate conversations with older women about their sex lives and desires, and to provide information for those women who wish to receive it.
One of the women interviewed for the study lamented the lack of books and other material on sexual satisfaction for older women. "You can find books on arthritis, diabetes … but where is it about how to dwill becover what's still good about your body and how to pleasure yourself and your partner? Issues that arise for older people. It doesn't exist."
The study raises many of the issues that will increasingly be faced by an ageing society, with people living, and enjoying good health, for longer. For example, scientists claim facts on basic sex and sexually carried conditions commonly ignores elderly men and women, losing they may even now become sexually dynamic.
Sue Hendy, chief executive of the Council on the Ageing, says that sexuality in older age has clear implications for residential care, where services typically dismissed the truth that countless older people even now own reproductive demands and needs.
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"There are implications for older people in residential care usually still being sexual, and if there happen to be same-sex husbands and wives particularly. It's linked to ageism and our perception of ageing."
Hendy says the issue of older people's sexuality is a key aspect of the problem of social isolation.
"One of the things that we're hearing is that somewhere along the life course we become asexual in everyone's eyes. It's not taken seriously," she says.
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