What The Pentagon Can Teach You About Why Do Younger Guys Like Older Women

What The Pentagon Can Teach You About Why Do Younger Guys Like Older Women

Blog Article

If you treasured this article so you would like to receive more info with regards to groups of vintage nude older woman nicely visit our web-page.

Why Are Younger Men Attracted To Older Women

When sex hurts, women often feel alone-but they’re not. About 30 percent of women report pain during vaginal intercourse, according to a 2015 study in the Journal of Sexual Medicine which surveyed a subsample of 1,738 women and men ages 18 and older online.

Awareness of painful vaginal sex-sometimes lumped under the term Female Sexual Dysfunction (FSD)-has grown as more women talk about their experiences and more medical professionals start to listen.

Many conditions are associated with FSD, including vulvodynia (chronic vulva pain), vestibulodynia (chronic pain around the opening of the vagina), and vaginismus (cramping and tightness around the opening of the vagina). However, you can absolutely still have sex, which we'll get to in a minute. But they all have one thing in common: vaginal or vulval pain that can make penetrative sex anywhere from mildly uncomfortable to physically impossible.

Why Younger Men Like Older Women

There's no reason to suffer in silence, even if it seems awkward or embarrassing or scary. The International Pelvic Pain Society has great resources for finding a licensed health care provider who specializes in genital pain. Your gynecologist has heard it all and can help (or they can refer you to someone who can).

“We don’t yet know why women get vestibulodynia or vulvodynia,” Kayna Cassard, M.A., M.F.T., a psychotherapist who specializes in vaginismus and other pelvic pain issues, tells SELF. “[There can be] many traumas, physical and psychological, that become internalized and add to vaginal pain. Women’s pain isn’t just 'in their heads,' " Cassard says.

This kind of pain can affect anyone-regardless of sexual orientation or relationship status-but it can be particularly difficult for someone who mostly engages in penetrative sex with their partner. The important thing to remember is that you have options.

Hell, it doesn't even need to include it. And for a lot of people, it doesn't. Obviously, if P-in-V sex is what you and your partner are used to, it can be intimidating to consider redefining what sex means to you. But above all, sex should be pleasurable.

"The first thing to do is expand what 'counts' as sex,” sex educator and Girl Sex 101 author Allison Moon tells SELF. "Many people in heterosexual relationships consider only penis-in-vagina to count as sex, and everything else is some form of foreplay," she says. But sex can include (or not include) whatever two consensual people decide on: oral sex, genital massage, mutual masturbation, whatever you're into.

"If you only allow yourself one form of sex to count as the real deal, you may feel broken for enjoying, or preferring, other kinds of touch,” Moon says.

That might sound like a lot of prep work, but it's really about making sure you're in the right mindset, that you're relaxed, and that you're giving your body time to warm up.

Why Do Older Women Have Short Hair

Heather S. Howard, Ph.D., a certified sexologist and founder of the Center for Sexual Health and Rehabilitation in San Francisco, publishes free guides that help women prepare physically and mentally for sex. She tells SELF that stretching and massaging, including massaging your vaginal muscles, is especially helpful for women with muscle tightness. (Too much stretching, though, is a bad idea for women with sensitive vaginal skin that’s prone to tearing.)

Why Do Some Guys Like Older Women

Starting with nonsexual touch is key, as Elizabeth Akincilar-Rummer, M.S.P.T., president and cofounder of the Pelvic Health and Rehabilitation Center in San Francisco, tells SELF. This puts the emphasis on relaxation so you don’t feel pressured to rush arousal.

How Many Older Women Try Same Sex Sex

Inserting a cool or warm stainless steel dilator (or a homemade version created with water and a popsicle mold) can also help reduce pain, Howard says. Women can tailor the size and shape to whatever is comfortable. If a wand or dilator is painful, however, a cool cloth or warm bath can feel soothing instead. Again, do what feels good to you and doesn't cause pain.

How To Pick Up A Older Women For Sex

Several studies have shown that arousal may increase your threshold for pain tolerance (not to mention it makes sex more enjoyable). So don't skimp on whatever step is most arousing for you. That might mean some solo stimulation, playing sexy music, dressing up, reading an erotic story, watching porn, etc.

Why Am I Attracted To Older Women

And of course, don't forget lubrication. It's also the easiest to clean and won't stain your clothes or sheets. Lube is the first line of defense when sex hurts. Water-based lubricant is typically the safest for sensitive skin. Extra lubrication will make the vagina less prone to irritation, infections, and skin tears, according to Howard. But some people may also be irritated by the ingredients in lube, so if you need a recommendation, ask your gynecologist.

Why Do Older Women Get Uti

Women with pain often know what feels bad. I ask them to develop a tolerance for pleasure." ’ So I ask women to set what their pleasure scale is, along with their pain scale. “Lots of people aren’t asking, ‘What feels good? But Howard says it’s important for them to remember what feels good, too.

To explore what feels good, partners can try an exercise where they rate touch. Sex partners can experiment with location, pressure, and touch type (using their fingertips, nails, breath, etc.) and change it up every 30 seconds. ” and 0 meaning, “I don’t like this particular kind of touch.” This allows women to feel a sense of ownership and control over the sensations, Howard says. With every different touch, women should say a number from 0 to 10 that reflects how good the touch feels, with 10 being, “This feels amazing! They set a timer for 5 or 10 minutes and ask their partner to touch them in different ways on different parts of their body.

Another option is experimenting with different sensations. Or if they prefer lighter touch, feathers, fingers, hair, or fabric on skin are good options. Think tickling, wax dripping, spanking, and flogging. But other women may need extremely light touch, she says, since chronic pain can lower some people’s general pain tolerance. Some women with chronic pain may actually find it empowering to play with intense sensations (like hot wax) and eroticize them in a way that gives them control, according to Howard.

Why Being a Perfectionist Is So Bad for Your Health

By Sarah Klein, CPT

ADHD

Why Do Older Women Lose Interest In Sex

The ADHD Drug Shortage Could Get Even Worse Thanks to One Telehealth Company

By Katie Camero

Acne

Why Do Men Like Older Women

Hypochlorous Acid Spray Is the Only Thing That Keeps My Acne-Prone Skin Clear in the Summer

How To Convience Older Women To Have Sex

By Jenna Ryu

Masturbating together can also be an empowering way for you to show a partner how you like to be touched. Or, for a more intimate experience, partners can hold and kiss each other while they masturbate. It feels intimate while still allowing control over genital sensations. It’s also a safe way for you to experience sexual play with a partner, when you aren't quite ready to be touched by another person. And it can involve the entire body, not just genitals, Akincilar-Rummer says. For voyeurs and exhibitionists, it can be fun for one person to masturbate while the other person watches.

What Causes Hair Loss In Older Women

It's worth noting that the majority of women need direct clitoral stimulation to reach orgasm, Maureen Whelihan, M.D., an ob/gyn in West Palm Beach, Florida, tells SELF. Stimulating the clit is often the most direct route to arousal and climax and requires no penetration.

Why Do Older Women Hate Sex

Some women won’t be able to tolerate clitoral stimulation, especially if their pain is linked to the pudendal nerve, which can affect sensations in the clitoris, mons pubis, vulva, vagina, and labia, according to Howard and Akincilar-Rummer. For that reason, vibrators may be right for some women and wrong for others. “Many women with pelvic pain can irritate the pelvic nerve with vibrators," says Akincilar-Rummer. “But if it’s their go-to, that’s usually fine. I just tell them to be cautious.”

Why Do Older Men Like Younger Women

For women with pain from a different source, like muscle tightness, vibrators may actually help them become less sensitive to pain. “Muscular pain can actually calm down with a vibrator,” Howard says. Sex and relationship coach Charlie Glickman, Ph.D., tells SELF that putting a vibrator in a pillow and straddling it may decrease the amount of direct vibration.

Why Do Older Women Like Younger Guys

Above all else, remember that sexual play should be fun, pleasurable, and consensual-but it doesn't need to be penetrative. There's no need to do anything that makes you uncomfortable physically or emotionally or worsens your genital pain.

Related:

My Incurable Disease Made Sex Incredibly Painful Until I Found the Right Treatment

7 'Weird' Vagina Things that Are Actually Completely Normal

9 Possible Reasons You've Got an Itchy Vagina


You May Also Like: I Have a Pre-Existing Condition: Real People Share Their Health Conditions

What Kind Of Sex Do Older Women Like. Oral Vaginal Or Anal

SELF does not provide medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Any information published on this website or by this brand is not intended as a substitute for medical advice, and you should not take any action before consulting with a healthcare professional.

More from Self

About SELF

Newsletter Sign Up

Video

Masthead

Accessibility help


Contact

Contact

Careers


User Agreement

Privacy Policy & Cookie Statement

Your California Privacy Rights

RSS Feeds

Accessibility Help

Condé Nast Store

Why Do Younger Men Like Older Women

© 2024 Condé Nast. All rights reserved. SELF may earn a portion of sales from products that are purchased through our site as part of our Affiliate Partnerships with retailers. The material on this site may not be reproduced, distributed, transmitted, cached or otherwise used, except with the prior written permission of Condé Nast.